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bursting

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Some days are better than others.  Today is Sam's 17th birthday.  I can't believe it.  Lots of calls from family.  But there won't be one from her, his God-mother.  I sometimes need to listen to sad songs on mornings like this.  Afterall, music is what feelings sound like.  THIS ONE makes me cry.  Everytime.  After listening about 3 or 4 times I latched onto the phrase….and quick went outside for a look at my still-covered garden.  It brought more tears, the happy kind.  A sign.

MWrosegardenapril09 

And when I'm in that place, I have to make stuff. 

MWsister0409 

And another page from the WN, because I found the perfect size Ville Valo photo.

MWHIMwall  

Comments

24 responses to “bursting”

  1. Judy N Avatar
    Judy N

    Happy Birthday to Sam!
    I get what you mean about the phone call. And I am sorry for your sadness. Just went through similar feelings a couple of weeks ago.
    I love the sisters page and I LOVE the WN (or more appropriately the MN) page!!
    Here’s a *HUG* for you!!
    Until later,
    Judy

    Reply
  2. Gilvania Jussara Avatar
    Gilvania Jussara

    Michelle, Happy birthday to Sam!!! Just like you, i listen to sad song, when my hearts wants cry !!!!
    The sister page is so Gourgeous!!!
    a big kiss, Gil

    Reply
  3. Megan Warren Avatar
    Megan Warren

    Happy Birthday to Sam!
    I know not getting ‘that’ phone call makes you sad – try to remember all the good things – she’s there with you guys. Love the journal pages!
    xxxx

    Reply
  4. Sam Marshall Avatar
    Sam Marshall

    Happy Birthday, Sam!
    Beautiful pages…mmm

    Reply
  5. kelly Avatar
    kelly

    Happy Birthday, Sam!!!!!!!!!!!! Hope it’s a wonderful fun filled day!!!!
    Michelle, *sigh* as always with your art 😉 LOVE it.

    Reply
  6. Regina Avatar
    Regina

    I love your “bursting” image. I cleaned up some of the dead growth from last year the other day. Even though we had several inches of snow on Sunday, it has melted away and there is so much new growth bursting forth here, too.
    Don’t you just love spring?

    Reply
  7. Manja Avatar
    Manja

    wonderful page and i can understand your feelings, every day is different… cheers and big hug, all the best, manja

    Reply
  8. hedwig Avatar
    hedwig

    HI Michelle,
    congrats to Sam!! 17 years, what a great age!
    And yes, with happiness sometimes sorrow comes too. How much can it hurt not to be called? The page is wonderfull, the song will never be the same to me.
    HUGS,
    Hedwig

    Reply
  9. karen cole Avatar
    karen cole

    You are an amazing woman. Talk about bursting. Your photo must be in the dictionary next to that word. You seem to carry the spirit of everyone you have ever known and then some. I would love to have just a fraction of your beautiful spirit and energy……..ah me, those journal pages are a feast for the eyes.

    Reply
  10. Carrie Avatar
    Carrie

    A belated happy birthday to Sam!
    That song is beautiful, and always makes me cry even though I don’t associate anything in particular with it. I’m glad you found solace and renewal in your garden. Your journal pages are beautiful. Also, I think I recognize that leaf trim; I think my mom has some of that! I love your impish Ville photo, leaning against your wall 😛

    Reply
  11. forcryeye Avatar
    forcryeye

    Happy Birthday Sam!
    I love the pages, and get it that sometimes you do have to listen to those songs…
    And the VILLE page………..aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!
    I have had THE PATH in my head all day…
    MWAH!

    Reply
  12. Linda Warlyn Avatar
    Linda Warlyn

    Happy belated Birthday Sam! I know these celebrations will be bittersweet for all of you, but I’m so happy there was such an unmistakable sign of hope and promise and renewal waiting for you in the garden. The journal pages are just awesome as always. oxox

    Reply
  13. Sarah Avatar
    Sarah

    happy birthday (yesterday) to Sam
    he might not have got that call from his godmother on the conventional phone, but you can be sure she made it anyway, and he heard it x

    Reply
  14. kim mailhot Avatar
    kim mailhot

    Sending extra big, squishy hugs for bad days. You are so awesome at finding ways to comfort yourself yet feel the pain at the same time, Michelle. You should be proud of that. Sounds weird, but I so appreciate the love you show in your mourning.
    I hope Sam had a super birthday, with his Godmother angel on his shoulder.
    Your garden is indeed bursting with life, lovely One !

    Reply
  15. inge Avatar
    inge

    Big birthdaywishes for Sam from Belgium too !
    Wish I could treat him on his birthday with some of my Belgian wafles I made yesterday 🙂
    Me too, I know how there is a place in your heart that hurts a bit more on those special days than other days… ( my sister died the day my daughter was born…).
    (I couldn’t find the music you linked too : the video is not available in our country, does it says..)
    If music can soothe the pain a bit , if tears of sorrow can give you relief , if nature helps to show important signs… she’s there.
    Once my sister said : “on the top of a match, there are millions of souls…’
    So, you can image, we are surrounded by all the souls of the people who passed by and your sister is quite close as a guardian angel…
    hugs
    Inge
    PS : I like your pages…

    Reply
  16. CatHerder Avatar
    CatHerder

    Happy Birthday to Sam! My sons birthday was yesterday too, he turned 18. Sorry youre feeling sad, its understandable…I still have all my family with us…but i spent part of yesterday crying myself..remembering when he was little…18 was kind of bittersweet for me…oh God im afraid for 21!!! Feel better 🙂

    Reply
  17. Cath Avatar
    Cath

    Hey Sam – happy birthday – 17th is a cool age.
    And {{{hugs from NZ}}}

    Reply
  18. Sharyn Avatar
    Sharyn

    Doesn’t time fly by? Our children are just babies then they’re teens. Where does time go?
    I think I know how you feel. My sister passed May 2007 after a long, brave battle with cancer. She was my daughter’s Godmother. Easter is bringing the tears for me as I vividly remember Easter 2007, knowing it would be the last holiday we would celebrate all together.
    I looked back at older posts about your sister and cried. They uncovered feelings that have been under the surface for so long. I miss my sister everyday.
    My sister’s name is Michelle and that is my daughter’s middle name as well. I believe the loss of an adult sibling is a unique type of loss. I love seeing pages in your sister journal-such beauty and emotion.
    May you find peace and comfort in your memories of her.
    Love your art!!

    Reply
  19. Marylinn Kelly Avatar
    Marylinn Kelly

    Seriously belated Happy Birthday to Sam. I know milestones are reminders of what your family has lost but you have a way of turning them into opportunities to celebrate what you’ve found…like, all of us. Smooches.

    Reply
  20. Judy Wilkenfeld Avatar
    Judy Wilkenfeld

    Birthday blessings to Sam and all of you.
    {Hugs}

    Reply
  21. Kathy McCreedy Avatar
    Kathy McCreedy

    Love to you from Michigan, via New Orleans, where I’m visiting my nephew… my sister’s only child… to celebrate his baby’s first birthday… the baby my sis will never meet, so I’m playing surrogate grandma. Sisters are truly special, and I know you miss your sis… everyday is still painful for you… but as you see, everyday really does get better. It’s just that the pain recedes in millimeters. So as you celebrate a special birthday and a special holiday, know there are lots and lots of people sending you love! All my best, xoxo, K.

    Reply
  22. cindi Avatar
    cindi

    Happy Belated Birthday Sam!
    michelle, your sister journal is so awesome.
    i love snow patrol so much.
    the HIM page is wonderful…*giggles*
    you inspire us all michelle.
    love,
    cin <3

    Reply
  23. Chris Avatar
    Chris

    Love and comfort and thanks to you,
    Chris

    Reply
  24. LIsa Hoffman Avatar
    LIsa Hoffman

    First anniversaries sting. There’s nothing to say but I admire the way that you remain so in touch with the TRUTH of your emotions. No denial, no Pollyanna, just the truth. In my experience, that’s the way forward.

    Reply

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